The Senior Sermon of John David Barnes, Class of 2006 from the Diocese of Alabama, given of November 15, 2005, in Christ Chapel

I know that some of you might find this a little hard to believe, but I am a scientific and mathematical type person. It's true. I know it's true. Throughout my grade school years, my strengths were often in subjects like trigonometry, calculus, biology, chemistry, etc. These subjects are very objective, orderly, formulistic -- oddly comforting to an analytical mind. In my past life I worked in the field of information systems and really liked working with computers, and still do -- to some extent. It was a comfortable life because for all practical purposes, I was an expert. People came to me when they wanted answers, and you know what? I had the answers. Good answers. I had it all figured out, and I knew it.

But our God has a great sense of humor, right? Just when I had gotten settled in my quiet, comfortable life, God starting speaking a little louder to me -- or maybe I started listening a little better -- and to make a long story short, I found myself here at seminary. On top of all of the other changes typical in the life of any new seminarian, the biggest shock for me was to go back to school and feel so utterly unprepared for pretty much everything we do around here. It was downright disheartening, and I asked myself on a daily basis why in the world God wanted me to do this. Working in technology, I had all the answers and was confident … proficient. On the other hand, in seminary definitive answers are often elusive, and I found it nearly impossible to know whether I was successful or not. For that matter, how does anyone know when they are successful in the middle of this vast grayness known as ministry? Do you know if you are successful when you baptize someone? What about when you hand them a piece of bread or a cup of wine -- the body and blood of Christ? How successful are you when you greet people after preaching, and they say, "Good sermon. Thank you."?

As my last year at ETSS passes by, I've realized that I've spent two years as a square peg trying to fit into a round hole. I've worried about how I was going to be ready enough. If only I could read enough books. If only I had enough knowledge -- enough facts. If … only. Maybe it's time I looked for a better approach? Maybe it is time for me to consult a master carpenter for a new plan? Make my prayer: Lord, I cannot do this on my own. The truth is, I do not have the answers. I am not confident. I am not proficient. Please, please show me how to do what you have called me to do. Please God show me the way.

It's no wonder that when I looked at today's Gospel reading, I felt great joy … joy in finding that Jesus has drawn up a wonderful blueprint. This blueprint contains the appropriate template needed to hone the edges off of any squareness, deal a little more comfortably with the grayness, and to not worry quite so much about having the answers or being successful. The blueprint is the Good News of the life of Christ. What does this blueprint have to tell us? Let's look at the specifications first. Matthew 24:45-51, considered by biblical scholars to come from the proverbial Q source, has a parallel in Luke's Gospel. It might be telling to note that in Matthew's version, Jesus devotes 2 verses to the faithful slave while the unfaithful slave takes 4. Luke's version occurs much earlier in the narrative, but is similar even though it qualifies the consequences of unfaithfulness with some additional verses. If your Bible happens to have some type of heading over this section of text, it might say something like the "the Faithful or the Unfaithful Slave" as the Harper-Collins Study Bible states. When Jesus speaks these words, he is in the midst of the fifth and final long section of teaching, or discourse, within the gospel of Matthew.

Jesus' time of walking among his disciples is rapidly drawing to a close. There's only a couple more days remaining before being handed over to be crucified. Maybe Christ felt a little review for his disciples was in order here -- they're kind of like seminarians, right? Jesus, who to my knowledge did not attend Yale Divinity School (maybe he went to Virginia?) poses the ultimate GOE question: "Who then is the faithful and wise servant?" "Who then is the faithful and wise servant?" Jesus -- knowing that some of us like definitive answers -- kindly does us all a great favor and immediately gives us a clear one. He affirms that those who feed others at the proper time are doing the will of the master. Reading this made me remember words of Mother Teresa -- a faithful servant herself -- "God does not call us to be successful. God calls us to be faithful." I don't know about you, but hearing these words makes me feel like God has liberated me from my great burden. Right now, some of you might want to interject here and say, hold on a second there, JD, how does faithfulness relieve of us of burdens? Doesn't it make everything far more complicated? Yes and no -- how's that for an Episcopal answer?

Certainly, it means we have far more work to do. Faithfulness means that we have to deal with different expressions of worship and belief -- even members of the Body of Christ have been known to argue what feeding others at the proper time should entail. Faithfulness also means we have to deal with difficult issues, and not just pretend they do not exist. There is a growing divide in our churches, our country, and this world. We must be able to engage differing opinions in a civil manner in order to be faithful. Faithfulness means we might have to recognize that the work of the The Church is really messy and vague and sometimes not very fun. And that's just being in seminary!

On the other side of the argument, faithfulness can make our lives easier because we are no longer relying on our own devices for an idea of success in ministry that is nothing more than an illusion. God pulls off the yoke of the control we want to maintain -- the control we think we have -- and relieves us of the burden of trying to have it all figured out, the burden of trying to find some gauge of success, and the burden of feeling like we have to do it all on our own merits. In other words, God gives the faithful more work and more responsibility, but we are no longer doing the work alone -- we have God's help.

But the blueprint we examine today contains additional directions, and these directions are not relegated to the fine print, are they? These directions concern the possibility that our woodworking might be unfaithful to God's plans. Verse 48 and following says something like this: "if the unfaithful slave assumes the master isn't going to return anytime soon, that slave will get a rude awakening. The notes in the NRSV tell us the actual wording is that the unfaithful slave will either be cut into pieces -- pretty gross -- or be cut off, presumably from the household. Take your pick, but neither choice sounds pleasant to me. Then there's that whole weeping and gnashing of teeth thing! I think unfaithfulness is pretty easy to define. Unfaithfulness is when we let our own "stuff" get in the way of glorifying God. Unfaithfulness is selfishness, and I have a feeling this is one cross we all bear in one way or another. Unfaithfulness is not trying to live life on God's terms, and instead living it on our own.

I think I've taken enough of your time now, so let me wrap up with something for all seminarians to think about. As seminarians -- future leaders of The Church, [scary!] -- peering into the uncertainty of our upcoming ministries, it might serve us well to study the entire blueprint before us as though it was specifically meant for us. What is our point in entering ordained ministry? Is it because we enjoy the feeling of being the confident … proficient … having the answers? Is it because we enjoy the feeling of being needed -- maybe if we are needed, we'll be able to exercise a strange sort of power over other people? No, the Gospel tells us that the reason for our ordained ministry is to be, quite simply, faithful. It is to feed the flock at the appointed time, with love, mercy and respect. Living in the Christian apprenticeship means we must live our lives as though we expect the master…the master carpenter, Christ, to return at any moment. May we all be found faithful. Thanks be to God!